Circular Validation

Do you hear me? Can you see me? Does what I say matter to you? Above anything else, every person on earth wants to know that when they communicate, it is received by others. Every single person wants to know that when they cry, somebody else hurts with them and when they laugh, somebody else is happy because of their laughter. In an ideal world, communication would be so simple, and it would be easy to understand that at the core, every single person simply wants to be validated. Yes I hear you, yes I see you and yes, what you say matters to me. I finally got this lesson after hearing Oprah say it so many times on her show.

But what happens when you do not feel loved and validated? I believe that God puts certain circumstances in our lives so we must always listen and pay attention to what He is trying to tell us. When something is off balance in my life, I stop to think, what am I not doing correctly? The answer is always right before my eyes. If you ever start to feel as though you are not worthy and nobody loves you or nobody is around to validate you, ask yourself, why not? You have to love yourself first. You have to know for yourself that you are worthy to be loved and heard.

But here's the harsh reality. Not everybody will like you, listen to you or even know that you exist. You could be standing right in front of their face and they will not see you because they choose not to accept that you matter to them. And that is okay. What is beautiful about our world is how diverse it is. For as many people who don't vibe with you and don't connect with your thoughts and energy, there are just as many folk who will. I have watched people force an alignment with others and it never works. If you have to work hard at trying to fit in with somebody, they are not right for you. I realized in my life that there were people who I had to dismiss as my friends. They did not fit into my circle of validation.

Your friends should bring you closer to the person who you really are inside. Your friends should elevate your passions in life and there should be a natural alignment. The key is finding people who are congruent with your thoughts and beliefs, and who share your passions. Once you find these people in your life, be sure to practice what you believe and receive. Listen to them, see them for who they are and let them know that what they say really matters to you.

Welcome

I actually started my blog several years ago, as you can see, and made only one entry - a very short entry, I might say. The main reason I hadn't blogged is because I've been very busy with my marketing company, Shaun Lockhart Apparel & Promotions (www.shaunlockhart.com) and working with clients to help build their businesses. I've also made a lot of life-changes that catapulted me face to face with decisions I thought I would never need to make. But now what I know for sure is that life happens to all of us, whether we want it to or not. Somebody told me once, "change is mandatory...how we adapt is optional." And if you think about that statement, it's very powerful and very on-point.

What I hope to do with my blog is to encourage thought and conversation. When I was a teenager, I published a magazine called Your World, and its purpose was to enlighten, inspire and entertain readers. I was featured many times in the Courier Journal and other local publications as the "Young Publisher" and when people asked why I wanted to publish a magazine, my response was always the same. If something that I write sparks just one person to change the way he or she moves through life, I have served a purpose and feel as though I have pleased God.

So the same is now true for my blog. Though this blog is linked to my company sites, the purpose is certainly not to sell anything or persuade anyone to use my products or services. My blog is my personal diary, and an outlet for me. I am not even concerned about how many people will see it or follow this because through the law of attraction, those who need to hear what I'm writing will find it, I believe. That is what matters most to me. So for those reading, welcome to my virtual livingroom. Sit for a while and have coffee. Let's chat it up a bit. You are also welcome to follow me on twitter @shaunlockhart.